I know it will all pass in an instant. I will blink and my girls will be all grown up. But right now, it feels like that moment is so far away. My girls consume my days, nights, and all the times in between. I stand in the shower an extra two mins so no one will disturb me, so I won't be mama for just that small window of time.

And then I make a cup of chai. And I worry as I sit there sipping my chai, that I will forget these moments, that when they grow up ill wonder about how my girls were as toddlers. That I will not recall the week Munchkin asked me everyone's last name. Or how she climbed on top of Cupcake to give her the pacifier. These  moments whose sum total are my days and nights will slip slowly from my memory.

I know these times are important. I know it and yet. I feel like I am barely coping. That I get through my days and when I sit down with chai I don't reflect on the day and all my girls wins and losses, or the cute moment that happened that day,rather I am just happy to have made it to that cup of chai, both girls safe in their beds and my sanity still intact.